Daily Gripe

Hello, my name is Stu. Today my gripe is twofold. Those stunt drivers that prowl the streets on their crotch rockets and those skinny guys with black skin tight pants. I don’t know who is the worst? You have the cyclists riding three abreast on a main road. I understand that bikes have the same rights as cars but you don’t see three Mini Coopers riding in one lane. Ride in the road but do it in a single line, just like the rest of us. And are those shorts painted on? Does your skin peel off when the pants come off? And what about that weird helmet you wear? You look like some lost alien or a broken bobble-head toy. I would almost like to nominate you for the matching outfit/bike award.
And you on the red rocket with your shirt billowing up near your head, weaving in and out of traffic faster than I can spit my gum out the window. There was that time during a summer traffic jam when you rode down the median. I guess motorcycle rules are different than car rules. And you don’t have a matching outfit. And you don’t have a helmet. I will simply refer to you as an organ donor. A little advice – if you had a chick perched behind you your shirt wouldn’t get blown up around your head.

Truly yours,

Mr. Pid