Daily Gripe

Hello, my name is Stu. Today my gripe is with the trash truck: or as it is so eloquently named – waste management vehicle. We don’t manage our trash. We dump it and let it pile sky high, then build a park on it and call it Mt. Trashmore.
This gripe goes beyond what we do with our trash actually it comes before what we do with our trash. Precisely at 2 AM in the morning. This is when our waste management company picks up the trash. Yep – 2 AM. Most residents are sleeping or trying to sleep when the old truck blast through the cul-de-sac. I hear it several blocks away even when all the windows and doors are shut. At times I am so startled that I jump out of bed and lose my balance, fall on the floor, hit my head and come close to an emergency room visit.
If indeed they need to prowl the neighborhood at 2 AM could they perhaps be a little quieter? Are all trash truck (waste management vehicles) really that noisy? Does the manufacture make them that way on purpose? Am I being punished for having trash?
After my sleep is disturbed I watch outside as they swoop down pick up my nice new trashcan and toss it wherever. Sometimes it lands on the sidewalk, the middle of the road or the neighbor’s driveway. Two days later I find one of my trash can wheels stuck in the street drain.
A few times we have received nasty grams attached to the cans; the cans still full of trash. Apparently we went over the weight restrictions. So what do they do weigh the trash before dumping it? I cannot find any weight restrictions on my bill.
I could use bags but then the feral dogs rip it apart and make a mess. I end up trotting down the cul-de-sac picking up my credit card statements and empty beer cans. And all this is done with me wearing my pink reindeer cotton nightie. Isn’t that a wonderful sight for all to see after they have been woken up by all the noise? Frightening!

Sincerely,

Mr. Pid